I was substituting as it availed it self, then took a temp job (temporary work -like Duct Tape-is a temporary solution) then was in need of employment again. This led me to Wal-Mart. I will say that holding a MA and submitting to the lowest rung of the Wal-Mart Ladder, is not what one expects at graduation. However, income was needed and work is work. My first days I wept over my state, this was a mix of pride and a sense of failure as a provider. One day, I suddenly found myself singing the goodness of the cross as I refilled the Pop Tart section. I realized that I had treated ministry like the cereal aisle, trying Total Christ for edification-being dissatisfied in lust, returning to the Lucky Charms of sin. Repenting, to the Frosted Flakes of forgiveness that fell like snow. Feeling redundant, back to the Snap Crackle and Pop of a worldly heart. Repenting again-retuning to the Golden Grahams of Godliness.
Oh how this cycle caused me to desire to abandon ministry, to life a “normal” life. (No life is normal-especially not a Christian life-what I desired was to be sidelined from the battle of sin and self in myself; and for the sake of the elect). But what satisfaction could I find out of abiding in Him??
Politics? – What has political activism done to aid humanity? Do we not all die and the poor and rich, oppressed and free, educated and uneducated spend eternity side by side either in the Kingdom or eternal Hell?
Law Enforcement? – Would being used to eliminate the observable evil from the sight of man, would it eliminate the damning evil in every man’s heart. If the crime is not observed, does it still not occur?
Education?-If I devote myself to education and teaching facts and figures, perhaps even morality-does not the unrepentant educated moral man stand condemned with the unrepentant ignorant immoral man?
Yes, this was revival, in the Cereal Aisle. A satisfaction that cried, “If I may restock Pop Tarts for the Glory of the King I will.”